Find Your Happy! The Storm!

It’s a reasonably sunny day and we decide to take a stroll down the street, at the end of the street an overgrown shabby tree has fallen and there appears to be no way around… as we stare at this tree looking for options the weather starts to turn & before we know it we’re attempting to hide under the branches of this tree to shield ourselves from a mammoth storm.
The storm appears never ending and until it stops, we can’t even begin to think about how we are going to overcome the obstacle that is the shabby old tree.

The walk – defines our standard journey through life
The tree – defines our obstacles (one of many)
The storm – defines our fear

See if we could pluck up the courage to stand up and keep going through the storm, we would find a quicker route around that obstacle…

Something similar happened to me recently. I was dancing through life blissfully unaware of my surroundings and I would keep bumping into these little obstacles.. that’s general day to day wear. Then a storm started to brew and a large obstacle was thrown in front of me.
If I was still thinking the way I was a month ago, I would say it was blown on top of me. I felt trapped.
In my mind, the storm was defeating me and I was shivering under the branches of the broken down tree. I felt broken.
This continued for around 8 weeks, although 4 I was really down in the storm drains.
When I look back on it now, I am in no way being dramatic when I say I am damn proud of myself for surviving the wars playing out in my mind.

I sought help from family, I messaged my mum 10,000 times a day, I bent my friends ear off with my woes forgetting to ask them about their day, I googled tactics to ‘get over it’, and I sought help from doctors when I began to lose so much weight I was unrecognisable.
Each one of those things helped me.. in some way or another. But what got me through?
A mental change in direction.
See when you reach that sort of low, eventually you run out of fear - I ran out of fear…

I cried until the tears dried out, scrambled through the muddy puddles and crawled into a walk in the opposite direction of my fear.

The further I walked the less it rained… and I began to believe “just a few more rainy days and the sun will appear”

Eventually the rain stopped…. A week or so after that the clouds began to separate and rays of sunshine eventually shone through.

We can’t avoid bad weather, we can’t avoid natural disasters or even wars in our mind.
But we can fight through them.
Step by Step
Day by Day

& you will be so thankful you did.

~ Blonde xox

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