Reliving Painful Situations...

Reliving pain – one of our most addictive forms of self-abuse. 

I’ve always been a ‘see a situation, sort a situation’ kinda gal. I need to see things through to the end, even when it nearly kills me.

I need answers.

I want closure.

Here’s the thing – when the situation is caused by another person, I never get either.

By reliving the past we believe it’s going to give us an opportunity to do it again, and respond differently. Maybe this time we will understand it better – what happened? Where did it fall down? What did I do wrong? What should I have done differently? Basically, torturing ourselves with the never ending record of “fuck my life”

Another thing we do, when replaying a situation in our own mind isn’t torture enough, is retelling your story to everyone in our life. Initially we may be looking for some form of reassurance that we didn’t do anything wrong or that everything is being okay but not only do we keep the situation alive and kicking by constantly replaying it, we invite the opinions of others, adding new chapters, and new thoughts to obsess over.

Here’s the thing, no amount of reassurance, can change what’s happened. Adding new theories definitely wont.

Living your life around a memory just gives it power to control you.

You can’t find happiness in the same place you lost it and you can’t find it by holding onto a painful story.

Happiness and forgiveness comes, when you take the decision to release the situation, let it go with peace and make room for something better.


Hydrate your soul!

I found this article on the website www.hopetocope.com and I really thought it was excellent. I always knew dehydration could make you feel a bit sloggy and more likely to make poor food choices and your body isn’t able to properly extract the goodness from the nutrients, vitamins and minerals in your foods unless you are fully hydrated but this article goes into how dehydration can directly impact your mental wellbeing. So grab a glass of water and give it a little read….

Water for wellness

Researchers now believe that even mild dehydration will have an effect on your moods. Two studies from the Human Performance Laboratory at the University of Connecticut show that it doesn’t take much dehydration (they describe this as 1.5 percent loss in normal water volume in the body) to alter your energy level, mood, and ability to think clearly. Female subjects in one of the studies also perceived tasks as more difficult when slightly dehydrated.

Dehydration, the body and the mind

The University of Connecticut study found that drinking water has a “significant impact” on alleviating depression and helping with concentration. It can also help with sleep disorders. In one of the studies, lead scientist Lawrence E. Armstrong, a professor of physiology in UConn’s Department of Kinesiology found that when dehydrated, the subjects were more cranky and fatigued. Not drinking enough water can also cause headaches, sleepiness, and confusion, said Armstrong.

How much is enough?

First off, waiting until you’re thirsty to hydrate is too late, as our thirst sensation doesn’t appear until we are 1 or 2 percent dehydrated, explained Armstrong. “By then, dehydration is already setting in and starting to impact how our mind and body perform.” So how much should we be drinking? According to the U.D. Institute of Medicine (IOM), women should drink six pints of water per day and men should drink eight pints of water per day. Remember that even if you think you drink enough water, your fluids will be reduced by heat, exercising or drinking too much caffeine


Speaking to the Universe!

Hey Everyoneeeee!

Today’s post is about ‘Affirmations’

An affirmation is a statement about yourself or your situation in which you desire to manifest into a truth.

I believe in putting out energy into the universe and the nature of that energy always returning to you. Ever notice if you walk down the street in a great mood smiling and saying hello to everyone that 80% of the time you will get a positive response? But if you walk around with the arse people cross the road to avoid you, without you even doing anything to them?

Vibes baby!

I also believe that what you truly desire, in your heart will be yours as long as you manifest it. Excluding people. Remember the universe has everyone’s back and it has a spiritual alignment for each individual person. You can’t go screwing up someone elses’ alignment by obsessively trying to manifest them into your life, it doesn’t work that way.

But if you desire love, respect, and inner peace – and you make your intentions clear to the universe through ritual affirmations (and actually believe what you’re writing) – it’s as good as yours.

Here are a few of my personal, most used affirmations. I write a journal daily, and I fill a page with affirmations of which I desire to attract to my life or my character.

“I am worthy love & respect”

“I release my expectations of others”

“I am free of worry and I am at peace with who I am”

“My strength is greater than my struggle”

“I forgive myself for past negative behaviours”

“I release past negative behaviours”

“I release >insert name of someone you wish to let go off< with love”

“I will feel grief, but I will not wallow in it”

“Life flows easily and effortlessly”

“I am growing, and I am healing”

Another recommended activity  is to record your affirmations and listen to them as you sleep, or repeat them to yourself as you look in the mirror. Just be aware that at first, it may bring up a few strange emotions as you tell yourself that you love yourself, or are deserving of love when you have been criticising and putting yourself down for years. It’s all part of the process though.

Give it a go for 30 days, I would love to know what you think!


Happy New You!

We’re about 6 weeks too late, but what the heck, Happy New Year!! <Insert sheepish  grin>

Imma be real with you, I spent the first part of 2019 locking down social media, putting all my profiles private, and I just haven’t felt like writing at all.

I don’t really know how to explain what’s been going on.. except.. I put all my eggs into one shabby little basket and the basket fell apart, my life with it. The problem with smashed egg’s is they never go back together again in the same way, and if you don’t clean them up, they leave an awful stench.

Here was the plan: I was going to wake up, it was going to be an amazing fresh start to the best year of my life and all my hardships of 2018 were going to banish away.

Here is what happened: I woke up, everything was the same as the day before and  none of the unresolved issues had miraculously vanished.

I know… Shocking really…  how fcking dare it not all go to plan overnight.

Here’s the thing about putting all of your expectations and pressures on New Years Day and New Years Resolutions -  it’s fucking stupid. Don’t do it.

So I spent the first week of 2019 hiding under my duvet, refusing to eat, licking my wounds and drowning in self-pity. Then the second week my mother turns up and drags my sorry ass to the doctors. I’m sat in the doctors and the first thing she asks me is “when did you last eat?” before proceeding to tell me that she could smell from my breath that my body had gone into ketosis… fabulous I thought – as my mother handed me a breath mint!

I was diagnosed with acute anxiety and depression, offered prescription drugs and/or cognitive behavioural therapy. Now considering I hadn’t eaten in a while and I couldn’t remember what day of the week it was, I’m pretty proud of my decision to give the meds a miss and accept the cognitive behavioural therapy.

By this point my work were on board and organised for 6 counselling session.

Everyone was on team Blondie… except Blondie.. but I was getting there – I was at least starting to open my ears.

The next 4 weeks would be filled with therapy, affirmations, Louise Hay on youtube repeat, early nights, food…. (didn’t matter what as long as I made sure I ate) journaling and messaging my friends and family on hourly interims to make  sure I didn’t bottle it up.

In 4 weeks (FOUR WEEKS)…

I went from going with it to shut people up to getting excited about a free parking space.

I went from holding onto toxic energy, to blocking out people who caused me pain.

I went from eating because the doctor commented on my breath to making full blown slap up dinners for myself.

I went from hating who I was, to kinda thinking that chicks “alright”

Not too bad for 4 weeks am I right? Now don’t get me wrong, yo girls got a long way to go.

I’m still struggling with insecurities, trust and letting people in.

But I’ve come so far now that I’m really dedicated to trying my best, and I’m super proud of that.

In the 30 years I’ve been on this planet – 2019 is my already my favourite. I’ve learnt so much about myself, about how my brain works and that kind of knowledge is going to help me make the most out of the rest of my life.

So, here’s to a shitty new years, and a wonderful 2019!